I travelled up to Birmingham yesterday and met up with my friend Rachel who I met at university and lived with for a year. It was really fun. Long, long day though. I ended up being out of the house for practically 12 hours (literally five minutes more and it would have been 12 hours). But so worth it.

I had a wander round the shops while I was waiting for her, we went to Pizza Hut, had another wander round the shops together and then went to the theatre to see the Mary Poppins musical. Went to Starbucks for a drink after (couldn’t track down an accessible pub on our way), wandered a little in paperchase then came home. Didn’t buy anything in all that shopping but I did get some merchandise at the theatre.

I loved loved LOVED the show. It’s touring at present but instead of a week here and a week there it’s just doing a couple of months each in about four or five places. I’m glad I had my initial “Birmingham is too far” thoughts (figuratively) slapped out of my head and arranged to go. The best bit was seeing the different ways in which they did things which were in the film. Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious was probably the best of those.

Some parts of the show aren’t in the film and vice versa. Rachel said she didn’t like one of the songs that isn’t in the film and whilst I didn’t think it was the best of the songs I wouldn’t go so far as to say I didn’t like that. To me the differences were part of what made it so magical.

And it was magical, it really was. There were stunts done in there that I didn’t think were possible in a small touring production. But then again 1) I don’t know this can be called “small” and 2) I suspect that might be part of the reason why they aren’t doing a huge multi-venue tour.

I think my favourite-ist song was one that wasn’t in the film - Anything Can Happen.

It’s got great lyrics which make me laugh and smile. And a fabulous message, one I need reminding of now and then - Anything can happen if you let it - I’d not thought I needed that reminder now but I guess I did because it’s made me feel more determined about a few things I’ve been debating.

[MARY POPPINS]
Anything can happen if you let it
Sometimes things are difficult but you can bet it
Doesn’t have to be so

[JANE]
Changes can be made

[MICHAEL]
You can move a mountain if you use a larger spade

[MARY POPPINS]
Anything can happen, it’s a marvel

[MICHAEL]
You can be a butterfly

[JANE]
Or just stay larval

[JANE & MICHAEL]
Stretch your mind beyond fantastic
Dreams are made of strong elastic

[MARY POPPINS]
Take some sound advice and don’t forget it

[WINIFRED, JANE & MICHAEL]
Anything can happen if you let it

[WINIFRED]
I wonder…

[ALL]
Anything can happen if you let it

[WINIFRED]
You won’t know a challenge until you’ve met it

[MICHAEL]
No one does it for you

[WINIFRED]
No one but yourself
Vacillating violets get left up on the shelf
Anything can happen, just imagine

[MARY POPPINS]
That should be epitaph
I wear the badge in
Hhonour of this world’s free thinkers

[WINIFRED]
Those who see beyond their blinkers

[JANE & MICHAEL]
Jelly isn’t jelly

[WINIFRED, JANE & MICHAEL]
‘Til you set it
Anything can happen if you let it

[MARY POPPINS]
Anything can happen if you let it
What good is a whistle

[BERT]
Unless you whet it

[MARY POPPINS & BERT]
Broaden your horizons

[BERT]
Open different doors

[MARY POPPINS & BERT]
You may find a you there that you never knew was yours

[BERT & MRS CORRY]
Anything can happen

[MRS CORRY]
Raise the curtain
Things you though impossible

[BERT & MRS CORRY]
Will soon seem certain
Thought at first it may sound clownish
See the world more upside-downish
Turn it on its head then pirouette it

[BERT, MRS CORRY & LAMP-LIGHTERS]
Anything can happen if you let it

[MARY POPPINS]
If you reach for the stars
All you get are the stars
But we’ve found a whole new spin
If you reach for the heavens
You get the stars thrown in

[ALL]
You get the stars thrown in

If you reach for the stars
All you get are the stars
But we’ve found a whole new spin
If you reach for the heavens
You get the stars thrown in

Anything can happen if you let it
Life is out there waiting so go and get it
Grab it by the collar, seize it by the scruff
Once you’ve started living life you just can’t get enough

Anything can happen, it’s official
You can choose the super or the superficial
Sally forth the way we’re steering
Obstacles start disappearing
Go and chase your dreams you won’t regret it
Anything can happen
(Anything can happen)
Anything can happen

[MARY POPPINS, JANE & MICHAEL]
Anything can happen

[ALL]
If you let it

I’ve been reading a few posts lately on other blogs where they share links to other blogs they love. And for the last few days I’ve been meaning to mention this so here goes.

If you’ve not been over to Screw Bronze! and read the writings of Elizabeth McClung, you really really should.

I had a really sucky day on Wednesday. But I also had a lovely surprise the knowledge of which (it was waiting for me at home) helped me through the suck and also most importantly made my day. It came as I was leaving the house but I didn’t get a chance to look at it properly till I was home later in the day.

A postcard from Elizabeth complete with stickers and a crane stamped on it. Yay for fun post and a cute postcard covered in fun stuff and chatty stuff. I love the blogosphere, I really do. I meet some great people.

And on the postcard she said she saw the photos of me doing the 5K and that I looked great. Elizabeth, who does a 10K after days of being really ill, goes on oxygen in the middle of the race and still manages to finish it in less than an hour, thinks I looked great doing a 5K really slowly and with much difficulty? Yup really not sure here whats more impressive.

And when I e-mailed her to say thank you for the card, she replied (part of it at least):

Each race is hard but if I space them out then it sounds pretty impressive (to me at least) to say I have done X race and Y race this year. So I am like an athlete or something, or out there doing it at least. And you are too.

Yup, Screw Bronze rocks. And so does it’s blogger.

Managed to get out wheeling for the first time in just more than ten days (?) earlier. And I wheeled myself 1.09 miles or 1.75 KM - more than one third of the course! Thanks so much to everyone who responded to my earlier “please sponsor me” e-mails and facebook messages. I now have more than double the amount of sponsorship I had first things this morning and it was the thought of not wanting to let you all down that got me out there training this evening. When I mapped the route out after getting home I was like “if I’m wrong and that’s less than a mile I’m going back out and walking until I have done at least that far”

Add in the fact that a friend got a free gift in boots and gave me the majority of it and a fabulous new haircut and you can definitely say that I’m having a great day. And that I have fabulous friends and family ♥ love you guys.

So someone mentioned to me earlier today that I haven’t seemed my usual cheerful self lately.  And we chatted and stuff,

He recommends that I eat a banana everyday.  And I asked him why

He goes:

“Well, have you ever seen a sad monkey?”

Best.  Depression. Advice. Ever.

A long time ago, on a Tuesday in February, I was diagnosed with depression.  And one week later on another Tuesday I received a phone call.

I was excited when I saw who was calling on the screen of my mobile.  But I should have known it wasn’t a good thing - because we were great friends but she never called me - it was always text and e-mail with the very odd letter.   Never in a million years did I expect what came next.  She had died the day before.

This year marks five years since the day I received that diagnosis. the day a week later when I received that phone call is five years ago tomorrow.  She died five years ago today.  I don’t know how it can have been five years.  It feels like yesterday.
Thursday marks eight years since her older sister and another good friend of mine died.  I don’t know how it can have been eight years.  It feels like yesterday.

And 11 days ago was the first birthday of Stevie’s since he left us.  In three months it will be a year - but it still definitely feels like the rainy day I sat watching candles burn and watching the rain poor down the window in my back door was yesterday.

February isn’t a great month for me, I really don’t like it.   But this year I’m working on the premise that “February is fabulous”.  And I’m remembering my friends by having fun and doing things and simply by LIVING.

I can’t say I haven’t had bad minutes/hours/days.  Because I have.  But it has made it easier.

I got told something today that would usually send me spinning and upset me.  Today I was just really amused - and I also thought it was really pathetic.  I think maybe this attitude is making me a bit of a bitch.  But it works for me.

I’m enjoying February more than I have in the longest time.

I’m having an amazing day… and it’s not over yet!

Yesterday there was much discussion between me and a few others and many e-mails sent about going to see various different things at the theatre.

The end result being that it was decided that me and Sam would book tickets to go and see Joseph and The Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat in Oxford in May. We’d also decided we’d go see a show in London and after much e-mailing settled on the Lion King. And when I looked up the dates online I saw that Dara O’Briain who is a rocking comedian is coming to Oxford. Ben and Geri wanted to come to that with me.

I’ve been busy on the phone booking tickets for the lot today. Spent a shitload of money but the others will pay me back. And.

Sunday 3rd Feb sees me and Sam in London seeing The LION KING which I’ve wanted to see for YEARS and which is on my 101 in 1001 list.

5th May is Dara O’Briain

And in June we go to Joseph!

And if that didn’t make my day great enough I then went swimming. And set a new personal best for walking.

And my great friend Lucille was in the coffee shop when I got there. She was like “Emma!!!” when she saw me. She got part of the way to me, abandoned her walker and literally ran the rest of the way before literally throwing herself onto me in a huge way and giving me the hugest and best and longest and tightest hug. like ever.

She went “I really missed you…. NOT!!” and cracked up, hugging me again.

Last night was fun.  Really, really fun.

We had venison casserole which is not something I would have chosen but was quite nice.  One of my sort of goals for the year is to try and get more variety in my diet as well as to eat healthier.  So that was a good way to start.  I’ve continued my good start today by eating chicken and bacon pizza and chocolate.  Both of which whilst being exceedingly yummy were not good choices for the diet BUT I have made some healthier choices/substitutions today AND  the plan always was to kick things off properly tomorrow.

Back to work tomorrow, not really sure how getting out of bed for that is going to work.  Am soooo tired it’s unreal.  Still a girl can try and this girl has plans so I can but hope.  But ugh, i don’t wanna go back to work.

I bought a new handbag today which is very yay!  That goes a way towards smartening myself up a bit and getting more organised.  Both of which are current short term ish goals.

We laughed a lot last night; about silly things and things that some of my other friends wouldn’t laugh about.  A lot of it was things that I was like “that’s one for the blog.”  like when just before midnight I said to Sam that I’d need to go for a wee soon and she went “you’ll have to wait until next year.”

Finally, book totals for 2007.  93 Books and 28,2621 pages making me an official bookwyrm (someone who has read either 100 books or 25,000 pages in one calender year)

Today is a tough day.  I am very glad it is nearly over!

I’ve been trying (and failing, I might add) to write out and explain the whats and whys and wherefores for some time.

The short version is the battery on my powerchair died on me in town earlier and I had to call in favours to get me home and get some of the things I was trying to do done like fetch my meds and do some shopping for me.  It was hard for me to ask for those and I felt pretty guilty that three different people had to put themselves out to rescue me and help me out.  Believing that I have CP, it doesn’t have me might be a great attitude to have most of the time.  But sometimes I have to ask for help and that’s not easy.

Then a right gossipy cow I sort of know eavesdropped on a conversation between me and one of my “rescuers”.  She could have just said to me “oh i don’t know if you know but disabled people can blah blah blah, that might be easier for you.” but no, I could told I should have done blah blah blah and saved my friend running around after me.

Yeah, thanks for that, love, I do guilt well enough on my own without you trying to pile more on me.  And the way you then told several people that my chair had died on me?  Nice, that.  Really nice.  Particularly as that’s the second time in a month you’ve  done the eavesdrop and spread it about thing to me.

I am very very grateful to have the friends that I do - the ones who rescued me today and the one who rescued me on Saturday when I locked myself out (my parents are on holiday).  Even if they do sometimes (today) tell me to shut up - because I couldn’t stop saying how sorry I was and thank you for helping me etc etc ad infinitum.

It might not be quite time for bed yet but I think it’s definitely time for chocolate!

I’m about to disappear off of the face of t’Internet for a few days.  I’m doing some mad crazy travelling around the country for three of the next five days, visiting friends and pretty much just coming home to sleep and shower.  And I think a break from this virtual world would be good for me.

My real plan is not to come online again until Tuesday but my slightly more realistic plan says not coming online again until Sunday (because that would allow me to tick go 72 hours without using the computer off of my 101 in 1001 list).

I think this is going to be fun, tiring, exciting, enjoyable, relaxing and crazy all at once!  I’m looking forward to it.